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A Compulsive Gambler Seeking Help

Compulsive gamblers do not readily seek treatment.

Seeking help is an admission to failure, an admission that their gambling fantasies are just that--- fantasies.

They may also have failed to get help from counselors or Gamblers Anonymous, and failed at efforts to control or cut back on their gambling.

The very idea of getting help for a gambling problem is often viewed with a great deal of ambivalence. Treatment may not work and may turn out to be just another failure.

At the same time, they fear that if treatment is successful, they may have to give up (in effect, 'lose') what could well be the most exciting or comforting activity in their lives.

Moreover, for compulsive gamblers, giving up gambling means leaving the world of fantasy to which they have escaped and confronting the problems and realities associated with everyday living in the real world.

When compulsive gamblers do seek treatment, is is often because something dramatic has happened in their lives, and they may feel coerced or blackmailed into seeking help.

A spouse may have threatened or filed for divorce, or just have left. When asked why they decided to go to a Gamblers Anonymous meting, it is not uncommon for people to say that their spouse said, 'it's GA or go!'

Others have been arrested for a crime, or a crime such as embezzlement has been discovered by an employer or business partner, and 'getting help' is a condition of not filing criminal charges.

A bank may have foreclosed on a mortgage. A bookie wants his money now! A suicide attempt may have failed, or a seriously contemplated suicide may prompt a search for help.

In addition to such fears and ambivalence, compulsive gamblers go for long periods of time denying that they have a gambling problem. Despite enormous and repeated financial losses, loss of employment, extreme indebtedness, and loss of family and friends, denial can be strong and persistent.

Compulsive gamblers live in a fantasy world where the big win that will solve all their problems is just around the corner, just another bet away.

There are a number of reasons for this. While there are many similarities between alcoholism and compulsive gambling, there are also some differences when it comes to the ease with which the problem can be denied.

Unlike the alcoholic who rarely has a 'good drunk', compulsive gamblers can have 'good days', when they leave a casino or a race track as winners.

For the moment, their lives are in order, and they see no problem.

Compulsive gamblers do not exhibit the obvious kinds of physical signs ans ymptoms of addiction that alcoholics do.

Consequently, it is easier for them to explain financial and other difficulties as due to something other than a 'gambling problem'.

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